My last post about Lynn and my relationship and time together was very sad. It explained, in a way, how difficult things can be. And things definitely got tough. Bad decisions were made, trust broken, and love.... well, misplaced.
  After a tremendous amount of effort to right the wrongdoings, and uncompromising love on Lynn's part, we were finally able to right our upturned ship. We are working through our problems and communicating our love in better ways. It is difficult and hard on the heart but if you want something you've got to fight for it.
  Right now she is in Japan and we have, not only distance but time to deal with. She is seventeen hours ahead of me. Also, I leave for army basic training in one month and then we will only have letters for several months. But, come what may, we'll get through it.
 
 

Soldier's Creed

I am an American soldier. I am a warrior and a member of a team. I serve the people of the United States and live the army Values. I will always place the mission first. I will never accept defeat. I will never quit. I will never leave a fallen comrade. I am disciplined, physically and mentally tough, trained and proficient in all my warrior tasks and drills. I will always maintain my arms, my equipment, and myself. I am an expert and a professional. I stand ready to deploy, engage, and destroy the enemies of the United States of America in close combat. I am a guardian of freedom and the American way of life. I am an American soldier.

A Bell

A bell is not a bell until someone rings it,
A song is not a song until someone sings it.

Love wasn't put in the heart to stay, for love isn't love 'til you give it away.
 
        -Oscar Hammerstein II

Dear Lynn,

As I am sitting here on my bed,
Writing this letter thoughts fill my head.
Thoughts of the future and thoughts of the past,
How some things change while others will last.
Memories are like that, forever for life.
Some filled with with love, others with strife.
Emotions from memories also stay strong,
And can stay with us all our life- long.
Your happiness and love, I pray that I bring.
That when you are with me I make your heart sing.
That you cry tears of joy, your laugh fills the air,
Because to see you unhappy, my heart cannot bare.
When you are with me and when you're away
You make me smile each 'n' every day.
You make me laugh, pick me up when I cry,
Make my spirits soar towards the sky.

You've Found Love

You know you've found love when your wishes come true.
When the stars shine brighter and the sky is more blue.
  You you've found love when one and one is two.
I know I've found love when I've found you.

Tis the Love

Tis the love of angels, tis the love of men.
Tis love intertwined since time began.
Tis the love to connect from miles away.
Tis the love of the heart that our bodies obey.
Tis the love of the saints, tis the love of gods,
Tis the love that will fight against all odds.
Tis the love like the mountains that reach towards the sky.
Tis the love of lovers that lifts love so high.
Tis the love that is strong, tis the love that is true.
Tis this Love I have, that I give to you.

Happiness

There is only one happiness in life, to love and be loved.

- George Sand -

Teach me your song, bird on the tree.
  Why is it you sing, continuously?
Show me your whistles, chirps and hums.
  You're happy daily and never glum.

Why Angels Cry

     It's been one month and 3 weeks since I kissed my one love goodbye. 49 days since I last saw her as she slipped through the gates to get on the plane to take her away from me. It has not been easy, in fact this has been the most difficult thing that I have ever been through in my life! I have stumbled and fallen and struggled to get back up. I have changed and made many mistakes and learned from them, (hopefully). This angel that I have fallen for as taken my heart and I am a willing prisoner of her, but the torture is impossibly intense and my whole being cries out every night! Everything I see, Everything that I do or happens to me throughout the day reminds me of all the times we spent together and the moments that we shared and created. All filled with the most true and tried love that can only come from being with the one who is meant to be with you.      
     The heavens must have smiled and laughed and cried as we did, and the ones on high would have looked down on our joyousness and said many prayers for us. But now they surely are crying as I have been with a necklace made of barbed wire and filled with lead around their hearts tearing away at the tenderness within with all the brutality of a ruthless monster.
     Many nights as I lay in my bed, my face pressed hard against my pillow to drown out my tears, I see her. The pureness of her innocence radiating from her beautiful face like a morning sunbeam shining through the clouds across the sea. It warms me to know that she is being taken care of but it is torture that I am not the one doing the taking care of her well-being and love. I could have a million people in my bed and it would still be as empty as a cathedral on a dark night, echoing every footstep and thought. Oh my heart! Do not fail me now! Now as the end of this Hell is drawing near. It is only the end of many beginnings to come and many more renderings of precious places in our hearts for there will be multiple and countless time when the skies will darken and the rains of angelic tears will fall for the heartbreaks of our foolishness and follies that cause such aches and pains of our hearts and minds. They will ask themselves over and again why we allow ourselves to be put through and to go through these horrible emotions that cause us to shake as an earthquake to the very souls of the earth. Can it all really be for love? Is it all worth the suffering just for a few precious moments of happiness?
     They must see us as the stupidest of all creation to be putting ourselves through such woe. Or, are we the stronger one? Never giving up on the light that we find in the eyes of the one that we have found love. Which ever way it is, and I and sure that it is a combination of the two, I still refuse to give up on what we have. No matter the consequences or heart ache that may come from it.
   This is what I think of as I lay in my bed. This and so many other things. The life I would be leading if I had never found the thing most precious to me now, The Love of My Life.
   Only a week left to go before I can finally see, touch and hold my beloved! And tomorrow is our 21st month anniversary. I am going to dedicate several hours of the day to just thinking of her and sending strength her way because that is also the day that she is going to be taking her Physical testing. I know in my heart that she will succeed. She is a most incredible person and I do not have a doubt that she will do her utmost best to give everything she has to accomplish her tasks. This is one of the reasons that I have fallen so deeply into this crazy thing called love. This wild emotional roller coaster that takes us from being at the tips of heaven to fighting and screaming in sadness and pain in the pits of the hells that we create for ourselves. But I have finally found my seat-belt in the profound love that she has shown for me and have strapped myself in, COME WHAT MAY!  
    To Amber Lynn; the Love of My Life. --{-@

                                                                                                                    Gabriel T. Short 

Damned Choices.

I am a fallen Angel,
The mistakes I make are my own damned fault!
I try so hard to fly,
Yet every move I make is as naught.

If only my heart were harder,
Maybe I could feel the right decision.
I do for those I love,
Everything, without envision.

Now see what has become!
My heart, my being is ripped in two!
Why can't we go back,
Before those I love, I never knew?

This Decision is mine alone,
And either way someone will get hurt,
But which will time heal faster,
Or leave forever decade and burnt?

The one I have loved so long
Still carries with her my heart.
But my Passion, Drive, my Lust
Alas! They, the other's art!

So pray tell me, if you can
Better is it to love as God
But never then to Crave her,
Or to feed the Lust; the heart never to be whole?

I am a fallen Angel,
What's done cannot be changed!
But more hurt and scars in the name of Love
Can be lessened and Refrained. 

Now I need words,
Serious, with Love, these are the modes
To tell the women in my life
Why I have chosen these life roads.